115 – The inner controller

March 20, 2017

(duration 23:43) The seventh and last inner critic we discuss is the inner controller, which tries to control various impulses and choices that might lead to ill effects, although it lacks trust in one’s biological drives and desires. The inner controller tends to use harsh strictures and even shaming tactics, which are indicative of developmental trauma that hasn’t been effectively processed. Raising awareness of this critic’s childhood origins assists in challenging the assumption that one is flawed and can’t do kind and caring things for oneself. Various domination systems that undermine self-reliance, choice, trust, and self-responsibility can be challenged as well. We need to orient towards compassionate understanding in order to heal parts such as this, which entails reflecting on unmet needs from tragic strategies.

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